★★★★★ – Smooth process with maximum screaming.

Honestly, I was nervous about selling my soul online but The Soul Exchange Authority made it so easy! The contract arrived beautifully printed, smelled faintly of sulphur and burst into flames when I tried to photocopy it. 10/10 would damn myself again.

— Eleanor. London (formerly human)

★★★★★ – Incredible customer service from Hell!

Lucinda from HR personally called to confirm my eternal suffering package and even helped me pick the right torment tier for my lifestyle. That’s the kind of customer care you don’t get from Heaven. Highly recommend the Cursed Collectors Edition.

— Darren. Liverpool

★★★★★ – Excellent value for an eternity of regret.

I got a certificate with a wax seal and the satisfaction of knowing my afterlife paperwork is finally in order. Beats my gym membership. Great quality parchment, you can really feel the despair.

— Melissa. Glasgow

★★★★★ – Would burn again.

Fast delivery, gorgeous design and I’ve already noticed a rise in demonic luck. My houseplants are thriving despite not getting any sunlight… Coincidence? I think not.

— Graham. Birmingham

★★★★★ – My partner laughed, then the lights flickered.

I bought it as a joke for my boyfriend. We laughed when it arrived, then the dog started howling at the wall and our Alexa whispered ‘Thank You!’ 5 stars for atmosphere.

— Jessica. Newcastle

★★★★★ – Very professional damnation.

I’ve dealt with other demonic entities before… Sloppy paperwork and rude imps but Mentis Morningstar is a total pro. Fast, courteous, efficient damnation and the certificate came slightly warm.

— Lucian. Leeds

★★★★★ – I sold my soul and got promoted.

Best career move I’ve ever made. Got the Collector’s Curse Edition, signed by Mentis Morningstar himself. Two weeks later, my boss resigned and I found £20 in an old jacket. Hell delivers!

— Kath. Bristol

★★★★★ – I had a few questions about the terms.

★★★★★ – Customer service hotter than expected.

— Herb. Alabama